Write a poem that describes something in nature that you feel strongly about. Be sure to tell WHERE you are as you observe your scene. Use your SENSES: SIGHT, SOUND, SMELL, TOUCH and TASTE. Poems should be a minimum of 12 lines
37 Comments
Jacorian Clayton
1/19/2015 12:37:01 am
In Germany
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:23:08 pm
Good winter descriptions. Work on avoiding repeating "cold"
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Jaylin Harris
1/19/2015 03:08:29 am
Up, up, up and away
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:24:10 pm
Not quite sure how mashed potatoes and cabbage relate. Other aspects are good.
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bailey L.
1/19/2015 09:50:32 pm
Wind busting towards
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:25:49 pm
Watch repetition of "the long green leaves"--work on developing the idea so that you don't have to repeat words and can build more of the scene.
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Nancy
1/19/2015 10:19:51 pm
Cold air all around
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:27:22 pm
I like the idea of the town tickling the mountains toes.
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Anders Lid
1/19/2015 10:25:20 pm
In a green open field
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:28:08 pm
Interesting use of the potato's eyes.
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Dagfinn Knutsen
1/19/2015 10:27:23 pm
The winter snow
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:29:23 pm
Push your use of adjectives to create more details to your nouns and distinguish Norwegian children from others that play in the snow.
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Anders Lid
1/19/2015 10:27:37 pm
In a green open field
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Eryn Johnson
1/20/2015 12:00:44 am
The sea stretches for miles on
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:30:52 pm
Nice use of intentional repetition to give the response to all the challenges the sailors face before their death.
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1/20/2015 02:09:31 am
Glorious sunsets
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:33:22 pm
Nice similes and metaphors here.
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Jose Mortenson
1/20/2015 02:13:16 am
The smell of the salty sea
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:36:13 pm
Push the variety of word choices to avoid repetition of words.
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Hailey Mueller
1/20/2015 02:18:16 am
Summer heat burning on my skin
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:37:22 pm
Think about fresh ways to present these images rather than the standard descriptions.
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Leanna Veilleux
1/20/2015 02:46:53 am
Drizzling rain and
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:39:02 pm
Nice use of fresh word choices to create the scene.
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Andreas.A
1/20/2015 03:39:31 am
I'm sitting there, watching the sunset
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:40:01 pm
Clear presentation of scene. Work on adding adjectives to your nouns.
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Michael Ruiz
1/20/2015 04:00:08 am
The Beautiful Forest
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:41:32 pm
Clear presentation of the story. Consider avoid "is" as a verb choice to push the power of the action.
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Rebecca Mann
1/20/2015 04:42:42 am
Mechanical whirring as the glass windows roll down
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:42:43 pm
Nice development of the scene. Use your vs. you're in the first stanza.
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Kayla Lambiase
1/20/2015 05:56:39 am
Winter in Garmisch.
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:43:19 pm
Strong variety of descriptions.
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Yazeed A
1/20/2015 04:49:42 pm
This is my "What a feeling poem" it talks about how I feel when I visit a park in England.
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:44:16 pm
Rather that telling about the senses--be more specific about how one sees, hears, feels the scene.
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Breanna Pope
1/21/2015 07:51:15 pm
Early in the mornings down in Texas
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:44:59 pm
Nice images. Develop more.
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Bekan Cevik
1/21/2015 10:27:52 pm
The grass so green,
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Ms. M
1/25/2015 08:46:12 pm
Interesting word choices here. I like the shift in the final lines.
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